I’ve noticed that some people like to hate on short shorts. I don’t know why because, personally, I love them. I’m a believer of that crazy idea that people should wear what they want to wear, and I want to wear shorts that are the shortest they can possibly be without showing my underwear because it is as hot as a bastard outside (and I sweat like a bastard). Here are some other reasons why I love the short shorts:
- They’re comfy. All winter long, my legs are trapped inside stiff jeans that don’t let them breathe. When summertime comes, it feels so good to give my legs some fresh air and freedom. It’s almost like I’m not even wearing pants, which makes me very happy.
- They’re easier to find at the store. If you shop in the juniors section of stores, pretty much all of the shorts you find are short shorts. There are a few token longer shorts, but it’s always a very limited selection. I can get my short shorts in any color, any style, any brand, and even on clearance.
- I like the way I look in them. I have what some people like to call “thunder thighs” and what I like to call “thighs.” Some people think that this means I shouldn’t wear short shorts. I should try to cover my thighs in long, black, pinstriped pants and wear a flashy top to distract as much as possible from my horrid thighs. All I know is that when I look in the mirror, I like what I see.
- My legs can tan more. I don’t go outside all that much. Since I live in the landlocked state of Pennsylvania, I can’t frequent the beach all that often. When I go outside, it’s usually on a leisure hike, canoe ride, or the park for swings. Wearing short shorts gives me the chance to get my tan on without awkwardly hiking through the woods in a bikini (though I bet that’d be sexy as hell).
- It’s not hurting anyone. Surprisingly enough, boys don’t turn into sex-obsessed robots that lose all sense of self-control and morals when they see me (despite what the media and school dress code enforcers might think). Actually, people don’t really check me out much at all. Even if they did, as long as they’re not drooling and making obscene gestures, I can just ignore it until we live in a society where human bodies are no longer objectified.
Therefore, I’m going to wear my short shorts. I’m going to wear whatever I want regardless of my body shape. Now is an important time to remember this with bikini season going on. Don’t ever let someone else tell you how to dress, unless they’re a fashion consultant and you’ve asked for their advice, and never ever think that just because someone else doesn’t think you have the right body for a particular garment that means you can’t wear it. Remember, the best way to get a bikini body is by putting a bikini on your body. The best way to get a beach body is by taking your body to the beach. Also remember, you’re beautiful, and what you wear will never affect that.